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Apr 20
Love0
Man and Woman Having Conversation in the Kitchen

The Power of Owning Your Feelings

By Conflict, Relationship Basics 18 Comments

“You made me so angry when you…”
“I felt really angry when you…”

These seem like similar statements on the surface, and the feeling behind them is certainly a common thread as well. While you could argue that it’s just a matter of semantics, the variation in wording can be reflective of a difference in mindset: blaming your spouse for your feelings versus taking ownership and responsibility for them.

Using “I statements” is a practical way to focus on owning your feelings in the midst of a discussion or argument. But what is the reasoning behind it? What happens when you do the self-reflective work around owning your feelings long before a conflict arises? Read More

Apr 13
Love0
Man and woman walking on beach during sunset

5 Habits to Hold Onto Throughout Your Marriage

By Connection, Relationship Basics 19 Comments

Brushing your teeth. Staying active. Paying your bills on time. These are small habits that can potentially have a big impact on your wellbeing. If you forget to do them once or twice, it’s probably not the end of the world. But stop doing them altogether, and the results could be less than ideal.

There are similarly small habits that, over time, can greatly affect the vitality of your marriage. You might start out doing them faithfully, then gradually, they become more and more sporadic, until you no longer do them at all. While their absence doesn’t necessarily signal that you no longer love each other, their presence enriches your relationship with a consistent connection and respect that stands the test of time. These are the small habits to hold onto throughout your marriage. Read More

Apr 06
Love0
man and woman hugging each other looking at skyline

Ease Each Other’s Worries (And Your Own)

By Resilience One Comment

Are you a worrier? How about your spouse? Truth be told, even the most carefree individuals find themselves worrying about something from time to time. Whether it’s little day-to-day troubles or big overwhelming concerns, worrying can consume us, if we’re not careful.

Much like stress, the way we manage our worries plays a significant part in the impact they have on our life and our relationship. In addition to learning self-coping strategies, you play an invaluable role in supporting each other when worries take hold. Let’s explore a few ways you can help ease your spouse’s worries, as well as your own. Read More

Mar 30
Love0
Cheerful newlywed couple dancing on sandy coast on sunny day

4 Common Newlywed Arguments

By Conflict, Premarital 12 Comments

Newlyweds arguing. Does that seem like an oxymoron? While it might depend on how long you define the newlywed period, we usually associate newlyweds with the honeymoon phase – that blissful time after the wedding when everything seems carefree and happy. You see each other as pretty much perfect, and hearts float around you as you gaze at each other adoringly.

Okay, that might be a bit cliché – and not very realistic. The truth is, the first years of marriage are often quite challenging. As you start your life together and continue to get to know all of the different facets of each other, new issues pop up that may not have had the opportunity to reveal themselves before. Here are four common topics you might argue about as newlyweds. Read More

Mar 23
Love0
woman giving man piggyback ride laughing

Marriage Successes in Disguise

By Relationship Dynamics 17 Comments

Do you ever feel like you’re failing in various aspects of marriage? If so, you’re not alone. Marriage is hard. Sure, there are “best practices,” but there’s no instruction manual that lays it out step by step. So it can feel like you’re floundering – making it up as you go and unsure whether you’re getting anywhere. Are we doing this right?

We’ve got some good news for you. Sometimes things that feel like struggles or failures are actually successes in disguise. Curious about some examples? Read on. Read More

Mar 16
Love0
Couple hugging in field

The Myth of Being Lucky in Love

By Relationship Basics, Resilience 9 Comments

“Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.” Have you heard this quote? Although it originated in the context of sports and athletic talent, the idea can be applied to relationships as well. Sure, we don’t usually think of couples as being talented in the art of marriage, per se. What’s more common is the idea that certain couples or individuals are lucky in love – that they’re so perfectly matched and have such good fortune, they don’t have to put any work into having a happy and satisfying relationship; it just comes naturally. They can just coast on their luck (in love), so to speak. What do you think? Do some couples have it this good? Do you feel like you and your partner fall into this category? Read More

Mar 08
Love0
Couple holding hands in love

Don’t Let a Bad Day Come Between You

By Connection, Resilience 8 Comments

How’s your day going? Maybe everything’s going your way. The sun’s shining, you hit all green lights on your commute, got great feedback from your boss on a big project, and tonight is date night. Or maybe it’s been one of those days – can anything else go wrong? You overslept, spilled your entire mug of coffee, and snapped at your spouse, all before leaving the house – and it didn’t get any better from there.

We’ve all been there. A bad day – or even just a bad start to your day – can throw you off entirely, affecting not only your own mood and wellbeing, but your relationship with your spouse as well. One bad day here and there seems harmless, but if we’re not cognizant of the way we handle them, negative patterns can begin to take hold. So how can you prevent a bad day from coming between you? Here are five tips to consider. Read More

Feb 23
Love0
Family of five holding hands walking through meadow

How Parenting Brings You Closer

By Connection, Parenting 2 Comments

There’s no getting around it.

Having kids changes your relationship. It’s probably not the first time you’ve heard this, and you may have experienced it yourself. We often hear about the negatives – how you have so much less time and energy to focus on each other, how easy it is to become disconnected, how if you’re not careful you can end up like roommates instead of spouses. Yes, these things are a reality for many couples at some point, but fortunately, it’s not the whole story. There are a lot of positive ways that your relationship changes when you become parents, too. Let’s explore some of the ways it can bring you closer as a couple. Read More

Feb 16
Love0
Happy couple laughing while browsing laptop and sitting with dog

5 Signs You Need to Check Your Expectations

By Relationship Basics 8 Comments

“That movie was such a letdown. From what everyone’s been saying, I expected it to be so much better!”

Have you ever experienced this kind of disappointment? Expectations have a huge effect on the way you perceive and experience life. Whether it’s that over-hyped movie, a party you thought you’d leave early (but ended up staying late), or the difficulty in transitioning to a new life stage, sometimes your own expectations can cloud the true nature of the situation at hand. In marriage, this can be a particularly game-changing realization – that you have the power within yourself to feel happier and more satisfied in your relationship. If you’ve been struggling in your relationship lately, here are five signs you might need to check your expectations. Read More

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