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What Our Parents Teach Us About Marriage

By Family & Friends, Relationship Basics 6 Comments

If you had to write a book full of the lessons your parents taught you, what would be in it? Would there be a long chapter on the importance of kindness or having a good work ethic? Would there be a glossary of “things we don’t talk about” or an appendix of secret family recipes?

While the contents might be different for everyone, one chapter that most of our books would have is “Lessons on Marriage and Relationships.” Yep, for better or for worse, our parents have a big influence on the way we think about and behave in our marriage. Through both direct guidance and observation, here are some of the things you may have picked up on. Read More

Smiling couple sitting on fence near meadow

25 Date Ideas to Match Your Mood

By Connection 9 Comments

What are you in the mood for? No, not for dinner. (Sorry, we can’t help you with that perpetual question.)

We’re talking about date ideas. You might have a go-to, never-fails date routine. If you do, that’s great! But every now and then, it’s good to switch things up. Not only that, but your mood can also have an effect on what kind of activities you gravitate to – and how much you and your spouse enjoy yourselves. Here are 25 date ideas to match your mood. Read More

Family Unpacking After Moving

5 Under-Appreciated Marriage Milestones

By Resilience 5 Comments

Getting married. Having children. Buying a house. Celebrating an anniversary. Some milestones get all the hype.

Okay, these things are a pretty big deal – definitely worth celebrating. But chances are you’ve felt a sense of pride and accomplishment over other “smaller” achievements – and for good reason! Although they tend to be overshadowed by the more renowned examples, there are many under-appreciated milestones throughout marriage that have a big impact on your relationship and confidence as a couple. We’ve rounded up a few of our favorites: Read More

Positive multiethnic couple laughing at funny moment in book

4 Times Personality Differences Work For You

By Relationship Dynamics 8 Comments

Do you and your partner have very different personalities? Even if you’re not complete opposites, you probably differ in at least a few ways. How do you manage your differences? One of the first steps is learning to accept them instead of trying to change each other. Once you’re able to do that, you can really begin to appreciate your differences. You might take note of how your spouse is able to chat it up with anyone, or maybe you admire how they’re not afraid of change. Once you’re in the mindset of appreciating your differences, you can go a step farther – and learn how to leverage your differences in positive ways. Here are four times personality differences work for you. Read More

Photo of a Man Carrying His Partner

5 Areas to Strive for Balance

By Relationship Dynamics, Resilience 3 Comments

When you hear the word “balance”, what do you picture? Is it a gymnast, perched atop a balance beam, arms outstretched in preparation for the big dismount? Is it a set of scales, one side sitting perfectly level with the other? Or maybe it’s something else entirely, which is fitting considering a sense of balance is a highly personal thing, unique to each person – and couple.

Sometimes, you just know when things are out of whack. Other times, it’s harder to pin down. Why is that? Well, we don’t just need balance in one area of our lives, but several areas that all intermingle and affect each other. If you and your spouse are feeling out of balance lately, here are five areas to consider. Read More

Man and Woman Having Conversation in the Kitchen

The Power of Owning Your Feelings

By Conflict, Relationship Basics 18 Comments

“You made me so angry when you…”
“I felt really angry when you…”

These seem like similar statements on the surface, and the feeling behind them is certainly a common thread as well. While you could argue that it’s just a matter of semantics, the variation in wording can be reflective of a difference in mindset: blaming your spouse for your feelings versus taking ownership and responsibility for them.

Using “I statements” is a practical way to focus on owning your feelings in the midst of a discussion or argument. But what is the reasoning behind it? What happens when you do the self-reflective work around owning your feelings long before a conflict arises? Read More

Man and woman walking on beach during sunset

5 Habits to Hold Onto Throughout Your Marriage

By Connection, Relationship Basics 19 Comments

Brushing your teeth. Staying active. Paying your bills on time. These are small habits that can potentially have a big impact on your wellbeing. If you forget to do them once or twice, it’s probably not the end of the world. But stop doing them altogether, and the results could be less than ideal.

There are similarly small habits that, over time, can greatly affect the vitality of your marriage. You might start out doing them faithfully, then gradually, they become more and more sporadic, until you no longer do them at all. While their absence doesn’t necessarily signal that you no longer love each other, their presence enriches your relationship with a consistent connection and respect that stands the test of time. These are the small habits to hold onto throughout your marriage. Read More

man and woman hugging each other looking at skyline

Ease Each Other’s Worries (And Your Own)

By Resilience One Comment

Are you a worrier? How about your spouse? Truth be told, even the most carefree individuals find themselves worrying about something from time to time. Whether it’s little day-to-day troubles or big overwhelming concerns, worrying can consume us, if we’re not careful.

Much like stress, the way we manage our worries plays a significant part in the impact they have on our life and our relationship. In addition to learning self-coping strategies, you play an invaluable role in supporting each other when worries take hold. Let’s explore a few ways you can help ease your spouse’s worries, as well as your own. Read More

Cheerful newlywed couple dancing on sandy coast on sunny day

4 Common Newlywed Arguments

By Conflict, Premarital 12 Comments

Newlyweds arguing. Does that seem like an oxymoron? While it might depend on how long you define the newlywed period, we usually associate newlyweds with the honeymoon phase – that blissful time after the wedding when everything seems carefree and happy. You see each other as pretty much perfect, and hearts float around you as you gaze at each other adoringly.

Okay, that might be a bit cliché – and not very realistic. The truth is, the first years of marriage are often quite challenging. As you start your life together and continue to get to know all of the different facets of each other, new issues pop up that may not have had the opportunity to reveal themselves before. Here are four common topics you might argue about as newlyweds. Read More

woman giving man piggyback ride laughing

Marriage Successes in Disguise

By Relationship Dynamics 17 Comments

Do you ever feel like you’re failing in various aspects of marriage? If so, you’re not alone. Marriage is hard. Sure, there are “best practices,” but there’s no instruction manual that lays it out step by step. So it can feel like you’re floundering – making it up as you go and unsure whether you’re getting anywhere. Are we doing this right?

We’ve got some good news for you. Sometimes things that feel like struggles or failures are actually successes in disguise. Curious about some examples? Read on. Read More