All marriages require work! Your marriage doesn’t reach perfection the moment you tie the knot, and your relationship won’t remain strong unless the two of you team up and make a commitment to work on it continuously. Life is busy, and it can be easy to let your marriage take the backseat when other people or deadlines seem pressing. In these situations, it is important to understand what it really means to make your relationship with your spouse a priority. Read More
As I was sitting and watching TV with my husband one evening, each of us comfortably plopped on our respective ends of the couch, I looked to my right and was somewhat astonished by what I saw. Lying there between us, in the no man’s land that is the middle couch cushion, were no less than four– four!– remote controls, plus our smartphones!
It suddenly dawned on me that this stalwart middle cushion, used much less than the comfy reclining ends we tended to gravitate to, was both literally and metaphorically coming between us. Read More
Last night was rough. Work ran late, traffic was bad, dinner was overcooked, kids didn’t want to take their baths or go to bed, and then finally, after all of that, my husband and I sat down for our Wednesday night “check in” and we just stared at each other.
I set aside time at the end of my (hectic) day for what should have been an effortless (and rewarding) talk with my husband, and yet we both felt like it was another draining task that needed to be completed before we could finally get rest.
If this situation sounds familiar – you’re in luck! Read More
You know what? Weddings are expensive. The beautiful venue, delicious food, trendy entertainment, stunning dress, personalized invitations, crafty decorations, photographer with the perfect eye, adorable favors, so on and so forth, it adds up. I spent just over $20,000 on my (small) wedding years ago and comparing that to others, turns out it was inexpensive! Wedding websites like theknot.com suggest the average cost of a wedding to be just over $31,000. Regardless of your financial situation, that’s a lot of money to spend on one day.
Assuming you spent a decent amount on your wedding, let me ask you – how much money have you invested in your marriage since your wedding? Read More
I’m busy. My husband is busy. We work full-time, we bring the kids here and there, we try to keep up relationships with our friends, etc. and after all of that, we barely have time for each other.
But this month will be different; we are making a commitment to “check in.” Read More
A few years ago PREPARE/ENRICH conducted a survey of over 50,000 married couples. It turned out that 78% of couples reported that they go out of their way to avoid conflict with their partner.
Maybe we could interpret this as a good thing—that the majority of couples are simply extra polite and courteous to their partner, not wanting to upset them.
Unfortunately, this is not the case. Avoiding conflict was listed as one of the top five conflict-related problems for couples. “Why is it a problem?” you might ask. “Isn’t it a good thing to get along with your spouse?” Yes, it is, for the most part. Read More
Why do we make New Year’s resolutions? Why not “Third Saturday in July resolutions” or “Birthday resolutions”? Perhaps it is because the beginning of a new calendar year offers a clean slate and the opportunity to literally start the year off on the right foot, in hopes that we will set a precedent that will carry through the remaining 364 days of the year.
Using this logic, we begin to understand that starting something on the right foot can set off positive reverberations that help drive us to success. Read More
Now that we’ve finished opening (or exchanging!) presents, let’s talk about being present!
The more tasks we can accomplish at once, the more productive we feel. We must admit though, that often these are tasks we can complete rather mindlessly— folding laundry while texting your friend and catching up on your favorite show. Your relationship, however, should not be one of these things; it deserves your full attention. Read More
We know that family of origin has a huge effect on how you spend your holidays. For couples, it is a time often filled with obligations and assumptions based on the traditions that you grew up with. For example, in my family Christmas Day has always been the “big” day, while Christmas Eve is more low-key. In my husband’s family, the opposite is true. In my family, we exchange gifts, but it’s not the “main event.” With my in-laws, the living room turns into a sea of presents and wrapping paper; it’s a pretty big deal.
It is assumed we will spend these respective days with our respective families and that we will follow the gift-giving guidelines of each. There is also a sense of obligation to make sure that we are spending adequate amounts of time with each side. It can get overwhelming sometimes. Although we do not have children yet, I know that the complications of these dynamics will multiply when that time comes. Couples with kids or those who are remarried: I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.
I am a realist. Often people describe us as glass-half-empty-people, but I say I describe the glass as it is. In actuality.
In my life this looks like a lot of direct communication, analysis, planning. I plan for what I think will happen, not what I hope will happen or fear might occur. If I am wrong I adjust my understanding of the situation and plan accordingly for next time.
© Prepare/Enrich
