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Relationship Dynamics

couple nose to nose in brown grass field

Leaning Into the Good Tension

By Relationship Dynamics4 Comments

“They really balance each other out.”

Do you know any couples like this? Do you feel like this describes you and your spouse? Does it simply mean that you’re opposites? While that might be part of the equation, there is more to it. After all, being vastly different could easily result in endless fighting, never seeing eye to eye on things both big and small. However, this often is not the case. Even if you consider yourselves opposites in many ways, something else is happening that actually makes your relationship stronger and more dynamic. Read More

Couple Walking in Shallow Water and Smiling expectations

The Lowdown on Expectations

By Relationship Dynamics3 Comments

What’s something you control that can completely change your perspective, even when you don’t realize it exists? This might sound like some sort of brainteaser riddle, but it’s actually a key to feeling happier and more satisfied in your relationship. The answer? Well, if you guessed expectations, then you’re right!

Yep, our very own expectations have the power to make us feel disappointed or pleasantly surprised, as if we’re failing or succeeding, unfulfilled or content. If you’re curious about why, and how this insight affects your marriage, keep reading. Read More

Couple holding hands in love

3 Hurdles to Asking for Help (& How to Reframe Them)

By Relationship Dynamics4 Comments

An extra set of hands around the house. Physical assistance during recovery from an illness or injury. Emotional support when feeling overwhelmed or dealing with grief. Financial assistance during tough times. Everyone needs help now and then, but it’s not always easy to ask for it. Do you struggle with this? Within your marriage, do you and your spouse ask each other for help?

If this is an area you could use some help with (no pun intended), then you’ve come to the right place. Keep reading as we explore some of the reasons it can be difficult asking each other for help – and how to reframe those hurdles to benefit your relationship and help you grow. Read More

Man and Woman Sitting on Green Sofa discussing money

3 Conversations to Have When You Clash Over Money

By Conflict, Relationship Dynamics2 Comments

Congrats! You just got a huge bonus at work. You’re already envisioning how you’ll spend it – replacing that ratty old couch with new furniture for the family room. You’ve been working hard and waiting for a little windfall to spend on something nice that you can both enjoy. You can hardly wait to tell your spouse.

What?! Your spouse just told you they got a big bonus at work – that’s great! But they’re already planning on spending it all – which you can’t really fathom. Logically, you know you could spend the money and be fine financially. But deep down, you feel like you just have to sock at least some of it away.

If you can relate to this situation, then you probably know what it’s like to have conflict with your spouse over money. You probably also know there’s no easy solution. That’s because money issues run deeper than being a spender or a saver. So how do you start getting to root of your differences? Here are three conversations to have when you clash over money. Read More

Positive multiethnic couple laughing at funny moment in book

4 Times Personality Differences Work For You

By Relationship Dynamics8 Comments

Do you and your partner have very different personalities? Even if you’re not complete opposites, you probably differ in at least a few ways. How do you manage your differences? One of the first steps is learning to accept them instead of trying to change each other. Once you’re able to do that, you can really begin to appreciate your differences. You might take note of how your spouse is able to chat it up with anyone, or maybe you admire how they’re not afraid of change. Once you’re in the mindset of appreciating your differences, you can go a step farther – and learn how to leverage your differences in positive ways. Here are four times personality differences work for you. Read More

Photo of a Man Carrying His Partner

5 Areas to Strive for Balance

By Relationship Dynamics, Resilience3 Comments

When you hear the word “balance”, what do you picture? Is it a gymnast, perched atop a balance beam, arms outstretched in preparation for the big dismount? Is it a set of scales, one side sitting perfectly level with the other? Or maybe it’s something else entirely, which is fitting considering a sense of balance is a highly personal thing, unique to each person – and couple.

Sometimes, you just know when things are out of whack. Other times, it’s harder to pin down. Why is that? Well, we don’t just need balance in one area of our lives, but several areas that all intermingle and affect each other. If you and your spouse are feeling out of balance lately, here are five areas to consider. Read More

woman giving man piggyback ride laughing

Marriage Successes in Disguise

By Relationship Dynamics17 Comments

Do you ever feel like you’re failing in various aspects of marriage? If so, you’re not alone. Marriage is hard. Sure, there are “best practices,” but there’s no instruction manual that lays it out step by step. So it can feel like you’re floundering – making it up as you go and unsure whether you’re getting anywhere. Are we doing this right?

We’ve got some good news for you. Sometimes things that feel like struggles or failures are actually successes in disguise. Curious about some examples? Read on. Read More

Man Hugging Laughing Woman While Standing in Body of Water

4 Things That Happen When You Stop Trying To Change Each Other

By Relationship Dynamics31 Comments

Licking your elbow. Herding cats. Nailing jello to the wall. All things that could be considered a waste of time and effort. Let’s add changing your spouse’s personality to that list.

Here’s the thing: your personality doesn’t really change. It tends to stay stable over time, which makes sense. It’s what makes you you. Sure, certain facets might modulate slightly as you pass from adolescence into adulthood or as you gain more life experience and perspective, but by and large – personality stays the same.

Most of us know this, logically. But we’re human, and we inevitably find ourselves wishing our partner was a little less this or a little more that. We get annoyed and frustrated. We wish they’d think or do things differently. However, when you shift to a mindset of acceptance, some really positive things happen in your relationship. Read More

Cheerful couple jogging outside

4 Healthy Habits to Commit to Together

By Connection, Relationship Dynamics8 Comments

Whether you’re into making New Year’s resolutions or not, one thing we can agree on is that creating healthy habits, no matter what time of year, is a worthwhile endeavor. And what’s even better than establishing healthy habits on your own? Committing to them with your spouse. You’re not only able to hold each other accountable, you’re also able to encourage and motivate each other to stick with it. This makes the a perfect combination for long-term success! Here are four healthy habits to commit to together: Read More

Couple walking into sunset, arms around shoulders, kiss on forehead

5 Times Patience Pays Off In Marriage

By Relationship Dynamics4 Comments

Patience is one of those things that tends to fly under the radar. Its presence can be overlooked or taken for granted, but if you’re on the receiving end of impatience, you’ll probably feel it. The truth is, whether you’re consciously putting effort into exercising patience or it comes naturally to you, it’s important. It’s not only an extension of empathy and respect, but a way to convey unconditional acceptance and commitment. Here are five times patience pays off. Read More