Skip to main content
Category

Premarital

Cheerful newlywed couple dancing on sandy coast on sunny day

4 Common Newlywed Arguments

By Conflict, Premarital12 Comments

Newlyweds arguing. Does that seem like an oxymoron? While it might depend on how long you define the newlywed period, we usually associate newlyweds with the honeymoon phase – that blissful time after the wedding when everything seems carefree and happy. You see each other as pretty much perfect, and hearts float around you as you gaze at each other adoringly.

Okay, that might be a bit cliché – and not very realistic. The truth is, the first years of marriage are often quite challenging. As you start your life together and continue to get to know all of the different facets of each other, new issues pop up that may not have had the opportunity to reveal themselves before. Here are four common topics you might argue about as newlyweds. Read More

4 Virtues of Great Marriage Mentors

By Premarital3 Comments

Have you heard of marriage mentors? They’re often part of premarital programs in churches or other couple-focused organizations. You may have worked with a marriage mentor couple yourself and experienced the benefits firsthand.

Marriage mentors are pretty much what they sound like: mentors for your marriage. Also called “mentor couples,” marriage mentors are couples who’ve been married long enough to have experience and perspective when it comes to the ups and downs of marriage. They provide support, encouragement, and guidance to engaged or newlywed couples. If you serve as a marriage mentor couple already, thank you for giving your time and experience to this important work!

There are some misconceptions about marriage mentors. It might seem like they need to have a perfect marriage and be experts on relationships, but that’s simply not the case. It turns out, the best mentors often have these surprising traits: Read More

Why Relationship Assessments Shouldn’t Be One & Done

By Premarital, Relationship Basics9 Comments

Did you take a relationship assessment before you got married? For many of you, the answer is (hopefully) yes. Have you taken one since? The odds are less likely.

We understand – a lot of that pre-wedding stuff can feel like boxes to be checked off before the big day. If that resonates with you, we challenge and encourage you to think of it as the start of a journey together, and in that vein, the assessment as a tool to help you take stock of things along that journey. Yes, that means taking an assessment throughout your marriage.

Need more convincing? Here are five reasons you should say keep saying yes to assess(ment): Read More

a family standing by a dinner table in a backyard, cropped to show only faces

How to Become Positive Marriage Role Models

By Premarital, Relationship Basics, Resilience6 Comments

We know we learn through observing others – this is natural human behavior. Previously on the blog, we’ve talked about what marriage lessons we learn from our families – either as a young kid or even into our adulthood when we’re so kindly given those one-liner pieces of advice from family members. Thinking about those lessons, we encouraged you to consider what things you carry forward and strive to live up to in your marriage and relationships, as what you’d rather leave behind. Your family has good intentions, but they’re likely not all marriage experts.

What happens when you flip the question, to ask not about what you learned, but what can you teach others?

Read More

A large family standing on a beach holding hands at sunset.

Crazy Families

By Premarital, Relationship Basics, Resilience, Uncategorized3 Comments

My brother recently got married. During the reception, they played the game where the bride and groom sit in chairs back to back. They each hold one of their own shoes and one of their spouse’s shoes in each hand. The DJ then reads off a series of questions, such as, “Who is the better driver?” or “Who is a night owl?”, and the newlyweds raise the shoe of whomever they think the answer is. It’s entertaining to see how similarly (or not) the couple responds!

One of the questions for my brother and his new wife was, “Who has the crazier family?”

Read More

A swing at an outdoor wedding.

4 Wedding Challenges That Will Benefit Your Marriage

By Premarital, Relationship Basics, Resilience10 Comments

Wedding season is in full swing right now, or at least it would be during a normal year. The reality is, even if you don’t have to cancel or postpone your big day, there’s a chance that things might look different than you envisioned. Feeling disappointment and sense of grief is normal and valid. We understand all the planning and resources that go into these momentous events! But we also want to encourage you to keep your eye on the prize – a long, happy marriage.

Here are four challenges you might be facing for your 2020 wedding – and how they might actually be an opportunity to strengthen your marriage in the long run.

Read More

A group of friends dancing with the bride at her wedding.

The Importance of Intention

By Premarital2 Comments

Planning a wedding has been classically described as a huge undertaking of time that costs a lot of money and has a ton of moving parts. With the average US wedding costing nearly $27,000, this description is a reality for many couples. From selecting the perfect dress, to the beautiful venue, to delicious food, and enjoyable entertainment, the task seems daunting. Especially when well-meaning family, friends, and about-to-be in-laws jump in with opinions as well as society as a whole suggesting the wedding has to happen in a certain way.

I’ll let you in on a little secret – Read More