How do you spend your emotional energy?
The world is heavy. We feel it. It’s hard to escape. And the weight of it all might be seeping into your relationship. It’s not a question of how to build a fortress to prevent the events of your community or society from penetrating your relationship; it’s a question of what amount of energy you devote to feeling those feelings, and at what cost.
What do you celebrate in your relationship?
Do you go all out for every birthday and anniversary or are you in a season of life where you barely have time to yell, “Happy Anniversary!” across the room as you head off in separate directions?
Do you celebrate the big milestones? What about the small victories? Do you still commemorate your dating anniversary? What about the anniversary of when you first met?
The thing is, we choose whether we want to make celebrations a priority, whether we celebrate both the big and small occasions, and whether we do that through grand or mundane gestures. By doing so, we create our own relationship celebration “culture.”
So why is this important?
I recently read a (fictional) book about a woman, Alice, who takes a fall at the gym and bumps her head. After a series of comical and confusion-filled interactions, she eventually figures out that she has completely forgotten the last ten years of her life. In her head, she’s 30 years old, happily married to the love of her life, and expecting her first child. In reality, she’s getting ready to celebrate the big 4-0, has three children, and is going through a hostile divorce. I’m sure you can imagine the hilarity—and awkwardness—that ensues.
The main storyline of the book revolves around Alice’s inability to reconcile the present-day state of her marriage with the one from ten years ago, which she believes is the present. What could have possibly happened in the past ten years to make them fall out of love with each other? Read More
When we think of retirement, we usually think about it in terms of money. Will we have enough to travel? Will we have enough to spoil our grandkids? Will we have enough to help our children? And most importantly, will we have enough money to live out our lives the way we want to?
When money changes because of retirement, other changes in the marriage happen without much consideration.
I recently sat down with several couples to learn about how retirement impacted their marriages. All had been married for over 25 years, with one couple even approaching their 60th wedding anniversary! To learn from the stories they shared, let’s consider the story of Mark and Marion. Read More
A few years ago, I went to a yoga class. I didn’t really want to, but a friend convinced me. I wasn’t really sure what I was getting into.
A few years ago, I went on a date with a guy. I didn’t really want to, but a friend convinced me. I wasn’t really sure what I was getting into. Read More
© Prepare/Enrich
