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resolutions

Habit Stacking Your Way to a Stronger Marriage

Stacking Your Way to a Stronger Marriage

By Relationship Basics8 Comments

When the new year rolls around, you probably hear a lot about resolutions and goals – whether you’re setting them or not. The thing about both of them is they tend to be a bit abstract. While it’s great to be ambitious, resolutions and goals that are too broad, vague, or unrealistic can actually have the opposite effect that you intended. You end up feeling unmotivated – like you’ve failed before you’ve even begun. At that point, why even try at all?

Of course, the key to avoiding this letdown is to a) adjust your goals and resolutions to be reasonable and specific, and b) break them down into smaller, achievable chunks. These smaller chunks might come in the form of “micro” goals leading up to a bigger achievement. Or you might think of them in terms of developing new habits that support your resolution or goal. Read More

January 4, 2023
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Cheerful couple jogging outside

4 Healthy Habits to Commit to Together

By Connection, Relationship Dynamics8 Comments

Whether you’re into making New Year’s resolutions or not, one thing we can agree on is that creating healthy habits, no matter what time of year, is a worthwhile endeavor. And what’s even better than establishing healthy habits on your own? Committing to them with your spouse. You’re not only able to hold each other accountable, you’re also able to encourage and motivate each other to stick with it. This makes the a perfect combination for long-term success! Here are four healthy habits to commit to together: Read More

January 12, 2022
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Couple holding hands, looking at each other walking down snowy street

What We Learn From Looking Back

By Resilience3 Comments

They say you shouldn’t live in the past, and that’s probably true. But learning from the past – that’s a different story. In fact, taking time to reflect on the year gone by – whether it’s a calendar year or another year of marriage – is a great way to learn more about yourself, your partner, and your relationship. So cozy up together and talk through some of these questions, maybe even grab a piece of paper to jot down some notes. Consider them from both an individual and couple perspective. We’ll provide some context for what we can learn and how they can help you gain valuable insight. Read More

January 5, 2022
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A little boy on a young girl's back in the yard.

Intentional Parenting

By UncategorizedNo Comments

Did you know that only about 8% of New Year’s resolutions are actually followed through?

Shocking, right? This is because we tend to make lavish goals that seem farfetched, like exercising 30 hours a week while balancing 2 kids’ schedules or going to every state in the United States this year. These resolutions tend to get thrown to the side to make room for other, every day priorities, like going to the grocery store, or spending that vacation money on your child’s traveling hockey team.

While we tend to make unobtainable resolutions for the New Year, many people still feel like the New Year is a fresh start, whether or not we make resolutions. Researchers call this feeling the “fresh start effect” 1 .  They have found that we tend to motivate ourselves into good habits by using a new beginning (like the start of the week, month, year, season, etc.) as a marker to put past behavior behind us and focus on being better.  It brings opportunity to reflect on the previous year and anticipate what you want the New Year to look like.

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January 18, 2018
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A couple lighting firecrackers together.

New Year, New You?

By UncategorizedNo Comments

New Year, new you, nice try.  We all fall into the same trap of “new year’s resolutions.”  This time, year after year, gym prices become “discounted,” self-help books flood our Instagram feeds, and green shakes capitalize the end caps of our local supermarket.  We are overwhelmed with the idea that we can change ourselves if we try just hard enough, so let’s push ourselves to reach that yearly goal.  Unfortunately, it’s easy to fall into this cyclical way of thinking every year.  Are you focusing your energy on changing the right things? Read More

January 4, 2018
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small house and picket fence

I am a Recovering Complainer

By UncategorizedNo Comments

I am a recovering complainer.

We were having a picnic lunch on a beautiful May afternoon.  There were three moms and four children.  While the children played, the moms talked. I remember talking about my house.  Actually, I did a lot of talking about my house.  I had a lot of complaints.  I live in a 117-year-old house that, by default, we are fixing up.  It is one problem after another. Not only did I complain about all there is to fix, but I also complained about the layout, the size of the rooms, the lack of closets, the location of the bathrooms, the lack of air conditioning…  I’ll stop there.  The picnic ended.  We parted ways.

Not long after the picnic, one of the three moms invited all of us over to her house. I parked in front and my daughter and I followed the sidewalk to the back of the house where there was a tiny backyard.  We greeted each other and were given a tour of the house.  I thought my house had small rooms.  I thought my house had problems.  Her living room was smaller than our office. There was one bedroom for four people, and it was smaller than my bedroom.  The floor was uneven.  It was dark.  It was crowded.  I was embarrassed.  I had complained about my house and here she lived in a smaller, more run down home than I did.  I felt terrible.  Read More

October 12, 2017
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A couple doing ballet together with the statue of liberty in the background.

The Art of Jumping to Conclusions

By Uncategorized3 Comments

We all do it – we all make quick decisions without hearing the whole story.  It’s our human nature; we had to make these rapid pivots to stay alive as cave dwellers.  Imagine yourself as a Neanderthal – there’s a giant snake in front of you, blocking the entrance to your home.  Unfortunately for the snake, you don’t have time to research if it is poisonous or not, you just have to smash it with a rock so you can protect yourself and your family back in your cave.

We still do this, but instead of a giant snake in front of the entrance to our home, it’s the garbage over-spilling in the kitchen, the same garbage your partner promised to pitch out last night.  She knew you asked her to do it, since you did it the last two times.  She must have decided it wasn’t a priority to take out last night.  This thought is appalling, what did she do all last night?  Watch documentaries about people with weird addictions?  That’s more important than committing to your partnership? Read More

August 10, 2017
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Marriage is More than a Piece of Paper

By Uncategorized3 Comments

This is part one of a mini interview series the team at PREPARE/ENRICH conducted during the month of May to celebrate anniversaries with couples like you.

As we approach the month of June, wedding season is upon us.  With weddings come anniversaries – many, many anniversaries.  Relationships are our priority here at P/E and we wanted to highlight the lives of some of our couples as they reach milestones in their relationships.  We have found that couples at all stages in their relationships have unique stories and great advice that we believe every couple could benefit from indulging in.  Take a few minutes out of your day to share in the laughs, well-rounded advice, and insights from our P/E family.

 

Introducing our first couple, Anna and Eric Read More

May 31, 2017
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Why I’m Not Setting Goals for 2017

By UncategorizedNo Comments

It seems like everyone is setting goals for the new year, but I don’t think I will. Don’t get me wrong, goals are great in theory and help people achieve results. However, I’ve never had much luck with goals. I always end up either convincing myself the goal was out of reach to begin with or I talk myself into a simpler version of the goal and end up feeling guilty once I accomplish it.

So, I’m not setting goals for 2017, I’m setting intentions.

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December 30, 2016
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