While Valentine’s Day should be all about the love, people often are divided on how to celebrate. Some *love* this holiday. They love the traditions that come with it. Weeks ago they put out the heart-shaped decor around the house and started crafting the classroom valentines their kids will hand out, just like they used to when they were in school. Days ago they picked out a red sweater to wear to work today and picked up heart-shaped candy to put out on their desk like they do every year. When they get home, they’ll look forward to the annual romantic dinner paired with a gift from their partner.
Others, well, not so much. They think this day is full of traditions of overspending, consumerism, and inauthentic expressions of love.
Regardless of where you fall, there is value in tying tradition into the holiday. Valentine’s Day can be a great way to remind yourselves to do things for your relationship because well, it’s tradition! We’ve got some different types of traditions worth starting. They might not all be realistic to do this year, but bring these up with your partner and decide what traditions you want to start – and maybe you already have some that fit these suggestions.
Here are 3 Types Valentine’s Day traditions worth starting for your relationship, and why they matter:
1. A tradition to show appreciation.
This can be really simple, but you’ll want to figure out something that fits with your style and unique relationship. Maybe it’s a love note you stick in your partner’s lunch on Valentine’s Day, or a romantic poem you write and share with them. Or it could be super simple, and just create a tradition of using this holiday as your reminder to genuinely thank your partner for all that they do for your relationship throughout the year. Be authentic and heartfelt in whatever way you choose to show your appreciation. This matters because showing appreciation allows you to express gratitude for the other person in the relationship. It helps them feel valued and drives them to continue putting in the effort.
2. A tradition to celebrate hard work.
Create a tradition that honors the hard work you both put in day to day to fulfill your commitment to your relationship. Maybe you think of this tradition as a reward in the form of an elaborate date night or even a couple only vacation. Or it could be a simple treat or indulgence of some sort that you both enjoy that you reserve for this celebration – maybe a fancy cake or bottle of champagne you pop to toast to yourselves. This matters because marriage is hard work, there’s no doubt about that! You’ve probably had at least one rougher patch over the last year (maybe you’re still in it). Celebrating the way you’ve worked together and continued to be committed to each other and the relationship is an important moment of reflection that helps motivate your future selves.
3. A tradition that invests in your relationship.
There are a lot of different ways you could construct this tradition. You could meet with a counselor for a checkin on your relationship. Maybe take an assessment like Prepare/Enrich or Couple Checkup to understand some deeper insights about your relationship. Go big and invest in a marriage retreat, or go small and maybe just do a little book club and read a relationship “self-help” book together. This matters because regardless of if you are newlyweds or you’ve been married for 50 years, investing in your relationship is always well spent time and energy. Undoubtedly, you’ll learn new things about yourselves and your relationship that will lead to more satisfaction and a more fulfilling life together.
BONUS: A tradition for your kids/family. Depending on if you’ve got little kids or grown adult children this tradition might look different. If you’ve got littles, consider putting the magic in this day for them. Make their food heart shaped, put a special note in their lunch box, have a little gift on their plate at dinner, or maybe even make a special dessert for the family to share. If you’ve got grown kids, maybe you send them a valentine in the mail, include a gift card for gas, coffee, or even a favorite restaurant to treat them and their valentine to a meal. This matters because modeling love for your kids is so important! They can see the positive effect love has on relationships and their family. Whether they are 5 or 35, you’re giving them the chance to learn about how you can show and express love in different and meaningful ways.
At the end of the day, we hope you’ve felt loved this Valentine’s Day and we hope you’ve shown love to someone in your life. Traditions are important because they help remind us of things that feel obvious sometimes, and they help string together the years in our lives. Building on the experiences year after year contributes to a beautiful legacy in your life.
Happy Valentine’s Day from Prepare/Enrich! Share in the comments a Valentine’s Day tradition you have in your relationship.
I think we are going to go through old photos together (maybe take that time to delete a few 100 duplicates and what not that are taking up storage space ) and then maybe decide on a theme for a short photo shoot together to add to our memories.
These are great ideas. THank you for sharing them.
Love your stuff. Last night my wife and I started a new tradition. (Her idea!) We attended a restaurant which has become a regular, where we knew there were paper table cloths with crayons. As we shared our favorite memories from the last year, we drew out our memory as we shared. The end result was a table full of color and fun images. We’ll definitely do this again.
Wow exelente nota de las mejores que he leído pues en mi caso casi satanizamos la tradiciones aunque sean muy buenas para aprovecharlas.
Solo con la palabra tradición hay algo negativo en la mente.. gracias por recordar que hay buenas tradiciones y las ideas de como podemos aprovecharlas.