Our time is so valuable these days. We’re always looking for ways to save time or make the most of our time. When all is said and done, what -or who – are we conserving that time for? Well, many of us want that extra time to spend with our loved ones – our spouse and family. Whether you’re in a super busy season of life or you just want to make the most of the valuable time you spend together, here are three tips for increasing the quality of your quality time:
- Ditch your devices.
Yes, this means all the devices – your phone, TV, computer, tablet, etc. It’s so easy to sit down and spend hours bingeing a new series, all the while hardly speaking or connecting with each other at all. So even if it’s just for 15 minutes before you start watching, eliminate the digital distractions long enough for a meaningful interaction. You could implement a “no screens” rule during meals or while lying in bed to incorporate screen-free time into your daily routine. - Be in the now.
Eliminating external distractions is one thing, but getting your mind to focus on the present and not your neverending to-do list can be another story. If you’ve ever spent time with someone whose mind is on a million other things, you’ve probably experienced the negative impact it can have on your interaction. In order to truly go for quality time over quantity, make the effort to be all-in mentally. - Spend time apart.
This sounds counterintuitive, but one tip for truly appreciating your time together is to not be attached at the hip. Spending time separately doing your own thing helps you nurture your individual selves so that you can come back together energized versus feeling resentment that you’re lacking time for yourself. Balance between “I” and “we” will look different for every couple, so communicate with each other about what feels right for each of you and works for your relationship.
There are a lot of things that compete for our precious time, so it’s only natural that when we spend time with our partner and loved ones, we want to make the most of it. Intentional tweaks like these can seem small but will pay dividends in the end.
If you’re looking for a new way to make small pockets of time extra meaningful or simply want to have some new things to talk about, consider checking out our Discussion Guide for Couples. It contains prompts and discussion questions on a wide range of topics to help you and your partner connect, whether you’ve got 20 minutes or two hours.
What are some ways you maximize the quality of your quality time?
We now set aside a day in the week to be together and plan something different e.g. a walk some where new or a cycle or drive even if at the moment we can only get a Carry out coffee . We also order a meal so neither has to cook. We are retired but life and family can still take over so is worthwhile.
Great ideas, Margaret. Thank you for sharing. I was just thinking about that very thing. We aren’t retired yet, but with the pandemic, I have been very isolated working from home and he has been so busy with ministry. I like the idea of making time for each other even if it’s just for 20 minutes or longer. Thanks!
My husband is a marathon runner so runs most days.
I get time and space on my own which I relish.
Also we go to the only coffee shop/ cafe in town and sit on the verandah and read the newspaper’s and enjoy a light lunch or a coffee & scone.
About three and half months ago, my husband and I began eating supper at the dining room table again. We had gotten away from this, and were eating in front of the TV almost every night. Now, we eat dinner and immediately afterwards we read the devotion book for couples, “Night Light” by Dr. James Dobson, then read a chapter in the Bible and finish with just talking to each other about our day. What a blessing and what a closeness it has brought to! No more dinners in front of the TV…this new closeness we feel is worth far more than anything we could watch on TV.
We have each Friday as “our” day. It usually is us just running errands, or taking the dog for a walk, but sometimes we do go out on a date. It’s nice to have that uninterrupted time with your partner, and something that is scheduled works well for us on different schedules. It’s nice to have a standing date and know that we are always making time for each other. We could do better on getting away from all the devices.