Whether you work from home or go into an office or job site every day (or some days), it’s a challenge to strike a balance between work and home. Why is this balance so important? Because when work begins to seep into all hours of our day, our relationship suffers. How can we avoid this path? One way is by being intentional about creating healthy boundaries between our work life and home life. Let’s explore some ways we can put this into practice.
1. Incorporate buffer time.
For many people, this could be during your commute. Use the drive home to mentally shift out of work mode. Listen to your favorite music or a podcast, and try to leave work in the rearview. If you transitioned to working from home in the last year, you may have realized the importance of this time and miss it. Try ending your work day with a walk around the neighborhood or a snack on the back porch to decompress and signal to yourself that it’s time to shift into your “home” mindset.
2. Designate work-free times or spaces.
This is especially important if you work from home. After all, your home is now where you work, and your work is now part of your home. The physical meshing of the two can lead to lots of mental overlap as well. You might find yourself feeling like you’re never really done working. This can also happen if your job requires you to be “on-call” or available outside of normal working hours. If at all possible, set aside times or spaces that are sacred – no work allowed. Maybe it’s at the dinner table, maybe it’s all day Sunday, maybe it’s during the bedtime routine. Choose something that works for you and your family and stick with it.
3. Jot it down, and let it go.
Sure, we can say it’s “work-free time,” but sometimes it’s just hard to turn off your brain about work stuff. Maybe you’re ruminating on a tricky issue or you just randomly thought of a great idea for the project you’re working on. Similar to the notion of writing down what’s spinning in your mind when you can’t sleep, go jot down what keeping you preoccupied related to work. The simple act putting it down on paper (or a note on your phone) can be both a physical and mental way of setting it aside for the time being.
4. Understand the value of being fully present.
Which do you think is more valuable: three hours with your spouse in which your mind is preoccupied with work, or 30 minutes with your spouse where you’re fully present with them? The answer is pretty obvious. Sometimes time simply isn’t on your side. Maybe you’ve got a big deadline coming up or the team is short-staffed so you need to help out. That doesn’t mean your relationship has to lose out. Dedicating even a small amount of time during which you’re fully engaged and in the moment can be much more meaningful than hours of your mind and attention being elsewhere.
These are just a few simple ways to help you navigate the balance between work and home. It can be a complicated dance, and the steps will probably change throughout your life. By setting boundaries like these, you’re better able to prioritize our marriage and stay connected to our spouse, creating a strong, reliable foundation for success in the other areas of our life, including work!
What are some ways you set boundaries between your home and work life? Let us know in the comments!
When my body is being conditioned to new physical work requirements we have a verbal agreement / understanding that I’m going to take a nap immediately upon returning home…besides an ‘I love you’ into my love’s eyes I simply fall asleep atop our duvet and that’s one way I can prevent grumpiness/defensiveness (A ‘4 Horsemen of the Apocolapse’ Gottman/divorce predicting behavior). Prevents HALT: Hungry Angry Lonely Tired which often trigger our more challenging behaviors…Prepare Enrich Facilitaor Crawford County NW Arkansas.
5. Reframe work/life balance as “Self-Care”. Studies have demonstrated time and time again that people with good boundaries, balance and self-care in life are actually more productive at work. When you can rest from work you actually do better at work and increase income. I seems counter intuitive, but it’s been proven to be true.
In my retirement, I have decided to take a certification which will allow a new occupation as I, along with my husband’s input, design it. As my husband and I are both well over 70 years of age, this school and new business setup/endeavor has challenged our less-than-five-year-old marriage. Boundaries have had to be set. Devotion to our marriage has to be intentional and scheduled (at least in my case). We are still on a learning curve, sometimes making daily adjustments, in order to keep our God-given, God-centered marriage first, front and center. For us, short, multiple prayer times each day and frequent physical displays of affection fuel and encourage our commitment to each other. Date nights and short trips are now more intentionally being woven into the fabric of our lives now. Relationships not yielding support and positivity are being prayed over, renegotiated or discarded. And, nearly every decision that we make is colored somewhat by the ups and downs of this current pandemic. Some of our “work” time as oldsters also includes keeping track of the growing cocktails of medications and supplements as more and more medical professionals recommendations are sought and attending those medical appointments together. Bottom line: we are busy, imperfect, not bored, and even more grateful now for each day that we have together.
Sue I was thinking i am the only one is that status but I must remember that my situation is universal. I my 70s married 6yrs coming up September, getting to start my own private counseling service plus i retired from one position at the age of 55 and stll has not stop yet. I feel working give you sense of relevant and we giving back and adding to our lives and others. Folks say all the time “Oh no you are not in your 70s” and I say ok then tell me how am I suppose to act in my 70s because I dont know I havent been here before. Sod i dont know what society will do with this age thing in the future because folks are not sitting down anymore.
We are relatively Newley weds, 2 years in November. We’ve had a rollercoaster time of lock downs living with in-laws. Job role changes for my husband and health issues for me. My husband works for church so frequently is out most evenings doing meetings and events, naturally o feel part of those and help out when I can. I’m still new at being a secondary teacher where it seems the normal is you never stop planning, marking and working. Never mind house chores (we have our own home and so grateful for that now!). The work Life marriage balance seems daunting as I’m constantly feeling bad about spending all day in bed to recover as my work gets pushed to the side and so does time with my husband. Life is hard but God is good I’m hopeful this season will end soon.
Do you believe in mental health? I believe that therapy is KEY in recovering your mental state, relationships, and maintains work-life relationships. PLEASE INVEST IN THERAPY, and IT IS OK IF YOU ARENT ALWAYS SURE OF WHAT IS GKING TI HAPPEN NEXT.